"Did you hear the one about the tense mummy? He was all wrapped up! (crickets)"
"Ooh, tough crowd. Don't leave me hanging! (Crickets) thank you, thank you."
"Guess who I saw today? Everyone I looked at, of course! (Booing)"
"How'd the hipster burn his tongue? Well, he drank his coffee before it was cool! (Booing)"
"How do you catch a skeleton? With a rib cage! (Booing)"
"I may only have a head, but I still have a funny bone! (Booing) Thanks! I'm here all night."